Friendship evangelism is believed by many today as being the right way to win a non-believer to Christ. They believe that in order to do so one must become a friend of the non-believer first and then when the time is right the gospel can be presented.
People believe that you do not immediately share the gospel and sometimes you never even have to.
None of this is true in light of scripture.
In fact friendship evangelism is a sinister work around to actually condones sin.
Hear me out on this as I present some scriptures to show how this is so.
The sin that is encouraged through the process of so-called friendship evangelism is "friendship of the world" as mentioned in James 4:4. There are plenty other verses that support this as a sin against God such as Romans 12:2, 2 Corinthians 6:14-15, and Ephesians 5:11, just to name a few.
Ye adulterers and adulteresses, know ye not that the friendship of the world is enmity with God? whosoever therefore will be a friend of the world is the enemy of God. James 4:4
And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God. Romans 12:2
Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel? 2 Corinthians 6:14-15
And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them. Ephesians 5:11
I will lay out how this occurs from my own past experiences with attempting so-called friendship evangelism. Keep in mind that I have heard and read other people's experiences with this as well and it plays out the same essentially every time.
Someone comes along that is not a believer. Someone perhaps at work or maybe a neighbor. You like the person and want to be their friend. So you become friends. In your mind at one time or another, as it does not always actually occurs at the onset of the friendship, you think about the chance to someday share your faith with that person. As time drags on that chance gets further and further out of reach.
You hang out a few times. You compromise on sinful behaviours such as language that includes crude topics and foul words. You dabble in sins such as ungodly entertainment. You may partake in sinful activities such as drugs including alcohol, tobacco, and the so-called more illicit drugs. You compromise in your music preferences. You make many other compromises within this so-called friendship that it becomes harder and harder to get back to a point to share the gospel. Even if you were able to do so your witness has been be blown by your own compromises. More often than not you just never bring up your faith or you do so with very shallow words just to get it over with in order to somehow make yourself feel falsely assured that you at least tried.
You essentially have yoked yourself to a dead soul and just like a live ox being yoked to a dead ox, the live ox will always be drug towards to the side of the dead ox due to the shear weight of the dead ox (sin). This is why we are to never become unequally yoked with non-believers even under the false notion of so-called friendship evangelism.
The chance to present the gospel never really presents itself. Mainly because you are too afraid of losing the friend or you are too embarrassed to do so. If either of these cases are true then you need to do a sincere evaluation of your supposed salvation. C.H. Spurgeon said it well: "Have you no wish for others to be saved? Then you're not saved yourself, be sure of that!”
If your reputation or some friendship is more important to you than a person's soul then you have eternal issues that desperately need to be resolved on your end with God.
This is essentially no different than the work around the Pharisees created through what is termed Corban. This was used to circumvent having to honor your mother and father when it came to physical possessions. It was a work around in order to justify sin.
He answered and said unto them, Well hath Esaias prophesied of you hypocrites, as it is written, This people honoureth me with their lips, but their heart is far from me.
7 Howbeit in vain do they worship me, teaching for doctrines the commandments of men.
8 For laying aside the commandment of God, ye hold the tradition of men, as the washing of pots and cups: and many other such like things ye do.
9 And he said unto them, Full well ye reject the commandment of God, that ye may keep your own tradition.
10 For Moses said, Honour thy father and thy mother; and, Whoso curseth father or mother, let him die the death:
11 But ye say, If a man shall say to his father or mother, It is Corban, that is to say, a gift, by whatsoever thou mightest be profited by me; he shall be free.
12 And ye suffer him no more to do ought for his father or his mother;
13 Making the word of God of none effect through your tradition, which ye have delivered: and many such like things do ye. Mark 7:6-13
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